There are a lot of other things that have changed since having a baby - I find that I have a much more positive outlook on life and that I find incredible humor in the silliest of things. I also find that I am much more laid back than I used to be. Don't get me wrong, I am still incredibly Type A - but to a lesser degree. My son has taught me that I
can't control everything...especially him! If he wants to sleep through the night, he will. I can't do anything, not even Ferber, to force him to sleep or not sleep. He has a mind of his own. If he wants solids one day and none the next, then he'll make it known. Short of stuffing a spoon in his mouth, I am at his mercy. He's small and cute, but his personality is getting larger every day! (That's him in this picture - it was his first swing ride!)Oddly enough, I miss the days that he depended entirely on me. Don't get me wrong, he's only 11 months old. So, it's not like he's packing his bags for college yet. It's just that he doesn't need me the way he used to - he can entertain himself, move around and hold his own bottle. When I stopped breastfeeding him when he was 7 months old, I was overjoyed by my renewed sense of freedom. Now, I find myself longing for that dependency again.
Who knew that I (of all people) would be going through a sort of separation anxiety as my son nears his first birthday. Oh, motherhood is truly an enlightening experience! Enough of my "deep thoughts"...I think I am going to do something "rebellious," like eating Haagen Dazs for breakfast. Not quite the same as skydiving, but it's still a thrill!
